I'm Back!

I am back from a brief time away... Our new house (new to us) is wonderful! We love our own space and marvel that it really is ours! Joy!!!

Then - there was this issue and that issue.... and how much will that cost???!!! Wow... the realization that it is all ours... a bit more sobering but seriously we are so blessed!!!

So - back to our lives we go!

We celebrated our Full Moon and it was a profound change for me and the hubby to be sure! Interesting what I learned when I set out to be the one teachin' that day! lol

Pagan Dad....

I took a page from Pagan Dad.... a great blog for families... and did a full moon with the kids....

This is always super stressful for me as I feel awkward and "on show" with the kids.... and I never know that they are actually listening.... you know? So I would like to share with you how I learned that my kids were listening and that they can be the greatest teachers of all!

But First! A review of the Blog of Pagan Dad... (click to go and explore)

I do not agree with all of his wisdom... but really when does anybody ever agree with everything??? He has good thoughts... thought provoking thoughts... conversation starting thoughts... thoughts from a distinctly male perspective....

He is a prolific poster that is also rather profound... he often has great information in a kid friendly format... easily modified, as well, so that you can tailor the lessons to your particular needs. I signed up for the emails... and there is no spam... but there are a lot of posts! Good if you are looking for information - but I did set up a separate folder! I like his ideas... from crafts to songs... rituals and chants... he does have it all! Thanks Pagan Dad! I really love your site!

Next... Pagan Kids.

Well, there is no doubt that my kids are pagan. My daughter runs around with any type of stick and yells... Abracadabra -- I turn you into a newt! My son casts an elemental circle before bed so he has great dreams.... and is often know to yell -- I am Angus mac Og! and I am fighting for my swan!!!!! I use my sword.... (I interject that he actually won the battle using his head..... to that I get a grunt....) Interesting on the playground... for sure. But I am still never sure they are really listening.... hmmmm....

The Full Moon...

So on our Full Moon we assembled marshmallows, sticks, a great fire in our brass bowl, and some stories to tell around the fire... we danced our circle open with motions that indicated the directions....

We started in the East and talked about Air - the kids flew around flapping wings and creating a great stir!

In the South we talked about Fire... we were flames that leaped and danced in a magical show of strength...

In the West - we were Water... we dove and swam like dolphins under water...

In the North... we were Earth... and we stomped our feet and felt the ground beneath give a little and still support us... They yelled there welcomes and my daughter rung the bell so hard it actually broke!!! (Hubby temporarily fixed it but we are now thinking it is asking to be retired.... lol)

Then we went to the Center... where we talked about the Goddess and the God...

We invited our Lord and Lady to our circle in a general manner were they both shouted out we love you our Goddess... it was cute... In general, we talked about what the Goddess embodies... and read the Charge of the Goddess Pagan Dad style... still needed some work... I lost em. but I thought it was still important to do....

We also talked specifically about Bride, Thor, Lugh and Hecate... quite a mix but the kids and us adults really do Identify with these particular Deities - so we utilize them in our rituals and are creating bonds with them - telling stories and creating a space for Them to flourish. I also felt that this allowed the kids to create a bond with something that is a bit more tangible and manageable than the entirely nebulous concept of Deity... a concept that my husband and I still struggle with.... These mini stories were met with questions and excitment but I still wasn't sure! I felt myself agitated that they didn't meet these awesome Gods and Goddesses with the correct respect and ... and what???

Hmmmm.... I was starting to get something but what it was was still alluding me at this point.... I sat back and told more stories.... as did my hubby... I am hoping that he takes over this a bit more as he really does love doing it! and the kids love to listen to him.... It was great to have some balance....

And the stories? We told many but in a nod to the season...

We mostly told stories of Lugh...

My son loves the God Lugh... He has identified with him ever since we first introduced him to Lugh... a picture in a Celtic book... and he opened the book and exclaimed -- I LOVE this God... who is He mom... Oh... that is Awesome mom....

And from then on... Lugh has been in our home! We welcome Him and His energy... and there is a lot of it!! My son loves to pretend that he is the Great God Lugh... and runs about the playground when others are Spiderman saying I am the Greatest Warrior I am Lugh!!!!

It is pretty cute.

But beyond the cute factor.... I started to think... he is really developing a bond with this God... He also loves Thor but always seems to come back to Lugh... In retrospect... I guess he is listening... but we didn't use fancy words or invoke or anything... we just talked about his story and made him more real - concrete to a little person that is really and willing to absorb that knowledge... That also made me think....

So on the the offerings... it was decided that four coveted marshmallows would be nice... and we watched as the grew and slowly turned black... eventually creating these eerie black clouds that slowly sank back into the coals... we watched while we toasted marshmallows and talked about the moon.. this was the Thundermoon.... a time of change.... That this moon was a time that the Goddess (Bride) was showing us that all things change... and that this to shall pass this Thunderous season full of storms and weather - giving way to a time of harvest...

S0, we discussed change. All that had changed ... and all that stayed the same... and many things were said in the safety of the Circle... my son opened up about his feeling about all the moves... my husband about his injury.... me about the instability we have all been feeling... and it was good to talk honestly... we asked the Goddess to be with us... to help us with our feelings... to help us with all of the change in our world....

Then we closed our circle... gave our gifts to the "Little People" as we always try to do... and off to bed.

That was it!

Short as needed... longer than it could have been.... but just right for this evening for sure...

That said... I wasn't sure.... I felt that I hadn't done it right... that I hadn't honored out Deities as they should be honored... you know??? It wasn't elaborate. It wasn't full of ceremony.... it wasn't even full of pomp. There were no robes (I am working on it) - there was not a proscribed plan - just a rough outline...

But it was Honest.

Honest and heartfelt done with the energy of my children and the stories of tired parents...

The profoundness of it has taken a few days to set in as it is a true departure for me... The whole shebang doesn't need to happen every month - sometimes a simple nod is okay... A nod done with sincerity, energy, and honesty is as good a nod as any really... I am my harshest judge. I need to lighten up apparently! lol...

So, that is what I learned this month. The Lord and Lady listened - they heard us... they were there... We felt the energy and the power of our Lady and our Lord with us and around us... in action ... in effect...

Honest and simple is really what works with my family... it may not work for all... it didn't have lots of candles.... it didn't have colours and robes... it didn't have chanting and singing... it didn't have ceremony or prescribed wordage.... it was just honest from our hearts... and maybe that is the connection that I have missed through the years... a freeing from the ceremony has freed me to see my Deities is a new light. A light that is still working for me long after the fires outside have burned down...

So - thank you my children for the gift of the simple... For the joy... For the Honesty to be myself and thus model how they can be true to themselves...

Blessed Be.

This is a story that I came across on the internet... I laughed so hard I "borrowed" it... the credit is entirely the person at the bottom... but I could so see H in a few years.... so I share... Thank you to the original author for the great laugh...

letter from a 3rd grade teacher sent home to Pagan parents:

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Thomas,

I write this letter in concern of your daughter, Aradia Moon. Please don't take this the wrong way, however, although she is a straight A student and a very bright child, she has some strange habits that I feel we should address.

Every morning before class, she insists on walking around the classroom with her pencil held in the air. She says she is "drawing down the moon." I told her Art Class is in an hour and to please refrain from then to do any drawing.

And speaking of Art Class, whenever she draws a night sky, she insists on drawling little circles around all the stars and people dancing on the ground. And that brings up dancing, I had to stop her twice for taking off her clothes during a game of Ring Around the Rosey! By the way, what does the term "skyclad" mean?

Aradia has no problem with making friends. I always find her sitting outside during recess with her friends sitting around her in a circle. She likes to share her juice and cookies. It is nice how she wants no one to ever thirst or hunger. However, when I walked over to see what they were doing, she jumped up and told me to stop, pulled out a little plastic knife and started waving it in front of me. I thought this was a bit dangerous, so I took her to the Principal's Office. She explained to the Principal that she was "opening the Circle" to let me in. She also said that her Mommy and Daddy always told her not to play or run with an "athame" in her hand, that she could put someone's eye out. I don't know what an "athame" is, but I am glad that she keeps it at home.

As for stories, your daughter tends to make up some whoppers. Just yesterday while I was talking sternly to Tommy Johnson and shaking my finger at him, he started screaming and ran from the room. When I finally caught him, he told me that Aradia told him and the rest of the class that the last time I shook my finger at someone, they caught the chicken pox. I explained to him that the Sally Jones incident was just a coincidence, and that things like that don't really happen.

One of the strangest things that happened was when I asked the children to bring in Halloween decorations for the classroom. Aradia brought in salt, incense and her family album. I see she has quite a sense of humor.

One of Aradia's worst habits is that she is very argumentative. We were discussing what the Golden Rule was (Do Unto others as you would have them Do Unto You), she firmly disagreed with me and stated it was "Do As you Will, but Harm None" and she will not stop saying "So Mote It Be" after she reads aloud in class. I try correct her on these matters and she got very angry. She pointed her finger at me and mumbled something under her breath.

In closing, Mr. and Mrs. Thomas, I would like to set up a parent/teacher conference with you sometime next week to discuss these matters. I would like to see you sooner, but I have developed an irritating rash that I am quite worried about.

With Deep Concerns,

Mrs. Livingston

P.S. Blessed Be. I understand that this is a greeting or closing from your country that your daughter informs me is polite and correct.

- by Ld Obyron Irondrake, 8/18/99

Ostara 2009 revisted

Well, it is time to reflect and share Ostara 09... what a great time!

The adventure outside -- it was great-- we ended up staying around home and looked for spring in a small area. I was worried as spring had just almost sprung but not quite...

The kids found that there were new shoots on the trees, some cool bracket fungus, some green shoots of grass, and clover patches starting to bloom again... there were definite signs that spring was coming (but totally clear to the struggling priestess that it was NOT really here... lol)!

Then a good game of tag at the park - spontaneous and very fun! We laughed and lifted our laughter to the Goddess... such joy is almost better than a full on nature walk... what seemed like not following the initial plan turned out, again, to be a wonderful distraction! There can be so much more learned, it seems, from being outside -- and experiencing the games of spring and summer... Lesson learned...

Moving back inside....

The kids really enjoyed making their God and Goddess pictures.... our volunteers were traced on large paper, and then the kids decorated the two pictures - girls on one side and boys on the other... It wasn't really intended that they section off that way but it happened naturally... Both the Goddess, with her amazing painted fingernails and flowing skirt, and the God with his butterfly chakras, sparkling aura, and fearsome body art... were amazing! It was so much fun to watch the creative juices flow with the kids working together to make something wonderful... And it was wonderful. The Goddess and the God were fully present in attending out ritual through the kids art... Cool.

We did a great spiral dance to clean our space and focus/raise some energy... They made lots of joyful noise! The noise makers and tambourines were great and worked really well to create some excitement for the evening and prepare them to be in the moment... But we will have to try something quieter as we have three children whom are sensitive to so much noise (even if it is joyful....) I think bubbles will work better... an idea I toyed with, didn't do, but I think will move forward with now... if we can't all enjoy the circle - then it doesn't work!

The process for creating the circle I think worked well... Hand to hand squishing while chanting helped to create a more real space for the kids to relate to... that is great as before we did not have that defined space -- and the ritual was definitely more defused... This felt tighter and more directed.

I loved the elemental call we used but it needs some fine tuning.... it was too long... I think the actions were better and maybe the only thing we used next time with a general call..... quicker and better for the attention spans we are working with...

Issues:

1. Candles:
We did not light candles this time. Too many little people and there was a safety factor there... We had candles placed but they were not used and that seemed to be a good decision. There were a lot of curious hands around the alter (my table) and flame seemed not really a great option... I was terribly worried about it so it seemed prudent to follow that instinct and just leave them be.

2. Cakes and Ale... It didn't move smoothly and it was awkward. I will work on that.

Things that I loved:

1. The magic -- we talked about seeds and how this is the time that they sprout - and planted some cat grass -- shocking -- but it is huge already!

2. We sang some (altered) spring songs... and danced about with them...

I have to say -- it really was a wonderful evening....

Thanks to all that helped! Your kids are amazing and so are you!

Things to think of for next time...

1. Should we keep the format the same? or take a page from other religions and do kid friendly - and then an adult section where someone helps wrangle for a short period of time...

2. For some of the dancing/singing portions - could we use some canned music? or do you like learning new songs ... I liked the songs... but it may add variety...

3. For cakes and ale... I loved the punch. did we all love the punch?

4. For the cakes -- is it working to shift between people for these items? I love seeing what people bring each time...

5. Full Moon. We need to discuss this.

Comments welcome from the group...

The Warrior Way

My husband and I have been negotiating what our family coven looks like lately. He has been reading the book, "Faith and Magick in the Armed Forces" by Stefani E Barner.... and has found how better to connect to a faith that has always been a bit -- exclusionary of his job. I have to admit that I often thought that he showed this passive - almost a grudging acknowledgment - of OUR faith that was more for my benefit than his. He went along with it... but he seemed uncomfortable in that skin.

I remember going to a meeting once where there was talk of the military incursion into another country... they held a special power gathering ceremony not to aid the soldiers - strengthening and protecting them -- but rather to aid the protest against it. No thought for the people that are doing their job... just the politics. We got up to leave as we knew we did not belong there. Needless to say, The Warrior was upset and rightly so. I remember him saying that he wouldn't really like to go back there as he never wanted his son to look at him and his job and think that he was "wrong". It broke my heart.

He couldn't be who he was! He had a hard time connecting his spirituality and his chosen career.

And I felt that I couldn't be who I was. I didn't feel that I had his support or his approval... as I said, he always was separate from what I was doing. I didn't feel comfortable sharing a Sabbat or Esbat with him... when he wasn't really feeling it! I never wanted to feel that I was forcing his participation nor making him feel guilty for his reluctance. This reluctance has always been a bit of a barrier in the closeness of our marriage. I believed in something totally - and he seemed always to be searching for his thing... I felt uncomfortable sharing this most intimate part of myself because he was not really onboard...

Well... no more!

This book has opened his eyes to the idea that the Goddess and God can work through him as well!

It has also got some great sections on deployment and kids -- ways to feel connected when apart. I think it was a real boost to him...

For the first time he has talked about initiation and finding our son's warrior name.

I think it is hard for men to connect in a female heavy faith... I have always believed in balance but the truth of it? Well, I have never practiced in a balanced way. I am still very female oriented in my worship... the Goddess is so much easier to relate to!

So we are renegotiating.

I can't wait to do more than browse the book... so far it has been all him...

I welcome my Warrior spirit home.

For more information:

ISBN: 978-0-7387-1194-2
Faith and Magick in the Armed Forces
Stefani E. Barner
(clicking on the link will take you to my bookstore!)

Enjoy and happy reading...

Ostara 2009

Due to life happening... we missed the full moon this month... Ugg. Missed it totally... So I think that this month we will celebrate the new moon (more on that later!)... and of course OSTARA! This is one of my favourite holidays - even though it is considered a minor Sabbat... I love the newness and the feeling of renewal that this change of season brings...

I know for our family - this holiday brings the hope that winter really is over... and the knowledge that there is probably at least one more good storm in there... We do love the winter here but by now our thirst for green spaces and blue sky is almost overwhelming!

So with all that in mind....

Our family ritual will involve a special candle or tea light as it may be.... decorate your alter with stuff that the kids find outside that shows that spring is on the way... Make some eggs - stressing that they are both a symbol of new life and of sustaining old... a perfect creation of our Goddess! There is a very cool experiment that you can do if you have some spare eggs -- that shows the amazingly strength of the structure of the egg --

The egg could almost be seen as the perfect metaphor for humanity... incredible strength paired with an extraordinary fragility.








Ostara 2009 - The Celebration of Spring!!!




First we need to collect stuff for the altar and look for signs of spring! We will go on a neighbourhood stomp seeking out signs of spring... perhaps the trail???

Come back with our treasures... and begin to dress the altar....

Move onto crafts -- representations of the Goddess and God for the season... whilst telling a tale of Ostara...

Need:

Foam sheets, stamps, paper, felts, other craft things... Two BIG sheets of paper... To trace two kids outlines

They will work together to create the Goddess Ostara and the Green Man....




Preparation / Setup	Three Beeswax tea lights -- Each deity and our New Spring Light All the stuff above... Libation bowl Egg shaped cookies (peanut butter chewies), milk
Greetings / Welcome	All Hail! Spring is here! Buds and leaves will soon appear! cheer!!!
Cleansing / Smudging	Sweep Sweep Sweep the floor - Worry and cares go out the door! Make sweeping motions toward the door whilst the laughter and merriment fills the space. Ring bells and bang drums.. Sprinkle area with salt and water....
Cast Circle / Protections	Then we will chant in the quarters, using the chant from Moving Breath: Oh, Spirit, Air Spirit Golden wings come dance with me (flap arms like a bird) Oh, Spirit, Fire Spirit Crimson passion burn in me (Hands up fire fingers) Oh, Spirit, Water Spirit Tears and ocean blend in me (Wave motions with arms) Oh, Spirit, Earth Spirit Stone and crystal steady me (Stomp feet firmly on ground) Hand to hand the circle is cast... say and squish hands together to cast... chant louder until we feel it - drop hands when cast.
Invite / Summon / Call	Lady Ostara, Lord of the Green... we invite you to share in our celebration of renewal and rebirth! The sun has won victory over the dark! We welcome you here!
Building Energy / Focus	It Is Spring (sung to "If You're Happy And You Know It") It is spring and it's time to fly a kite! It is spring and it's time to fly a kite! It is spring that's the season! We don't need a better reason! It is spring and it's time to fly a kite! AND: Spring Song (Tune: Are You Sleeping) It is spring time It is spring time Winter's gone Winter's gone Summer time is coming Summer time is coming It won't be long It won't be long
Primary Ritual Act	Blessing and Planting seeds... Bless these seeds, Lord and Lady, that they may grow and flourish as the hopes and aspirations of your children would do! Power Joy and Energy! (Chant this - starting small on the ground... then grow up towards the sky) When there is enough energy -- Yell -- Grow!
Offerings / Communion	Great Rite: HP kneels: holding challice... says... HPS- dips into challice with athame... "As the athame is to the male.. so the cup is to the female... and joined they become one in truth." kiss. Both sip and then hand to rest of coven... "may you never thirst" Cakes: HPS - holds plate and draws pentagram over while HP Says: Dearest Lady - Bless this food into our bodies. Give us Health Wealth strength joy and peace. Kiss Hand to coven... "may you never hunger"
Thanks / Dismissal	Our thanks dear Lady and our Lord for attending our Sabat! Hail and Farewell! (echo once) Earth Spirit (stomp), Water Spirit (woosh) Fire Spirit (fire fingers) Air (flap like bird) We thank you for your watchful care! Hail and Farewell! (Echo each direction - so 4 times....)
Grounding / Release	Slap the ground grab hands
Dissolve Circle / Protections	Hand to hand we release Our circle is uncast. Squish around once and then release up to the sky - sitting down right after...Slap the ground again
Release Group	The circle is open, and yet unbroken May the love of the Goddess be ever in your heart Merry meet and merry part And merry meet again.

Pagan Family's and School

Seems like an odd place to start a blog, but it was where my solitary days ended and my out of the broom closet family days began....

It was Yule (Christmas)... This was my son's first year in school - and we were doing what we normally did - put up tree and talk about Father Winter... definitely Yule light... Until....

He came home one day while the school was leading up to the Christmas concert. My son was upset that one of his classmates had told him his shirt was not okay. Kids can be cruel, so I was mentally prepared for a comment in regards to the age or color of the shirt... not the content. It was a simple shirt that said "I rule" and a ruler was underneath... not pagan not even offensive really... but to the little class mate of his -- totally not okay... because only Jesus and God rule the world...

Yup he had been filled up with a bunch of information from a fellow kindergarten student about what to believe... I had not done my job and left a gap... He didn't know what we believed... so his very special friend was filling that information gap... Add to that the season... and the area.... I had a little 5 year old that was loudly insisting that he believed something vastly different than we did. It was uncomfortable and seemed really wrong. I had worked hard to create harmony and peace in our family... with our ideals... but I didn't want to tell him what to believe -- he should be able to choose...

Right?

Nope.

Nope it wasn't alright. It was disharmonious and seemed so wrong... We had a little uninformed person that was desperate to know what to believe... who created the world... where do we go when we die.... what are we celebrating.... do we celebrate anything? Why father winter??? Why a tree... So many questions... and I hadn't told him anything... I had not included him in ritual because he was too little - and I was not ready to share or be so OUT! Sharing with the family meant that it was no longer my personal little thing... Sharing meant putting it all out there -- directing my families beliefs and sharing so much of myself...and that was huge! I felt naked and exposed - prepared for ridicule and .... and... well the unexplored territory that was new.... uncomfortable... to exposed... with nothing to really hide behind...

I was very used to saying -- oh ya we are a pagan family.... but that wasn't true... I was pagan. Privately and intensely passionate... but not PUBLIC. My family was struggling. Not centred. Not in harmony. Not on the same page at all... My dear husband was also struggling... I didn't really notice.... that was his job to believe what he wanted...(more on that later)

So - I had to make a choice... Either it was out of my hands and I would have a "little Jesus Freak" stomping around and talking about what his little friend was saying was true.... or I stepped up and said well... that is one way to look at the world but this is ours... neither is wrong they are just different...

There were tears (from everyone) -- there was confusion (from everywhere)... and we are muddling through! This is now our world... not just mine and I have never been more proud of my kids... we share something amazing now. I was so afraid but the Goddess has filled me with her blessings and given me the words to share and the patience to weather the storms ahead... we are more of a family now - even my husband is excited and more centred -- more male if that is possible. Potent.

Things all happen for a reason. There are more ways to the old ways that there are colors in the universe - if I can help someone unify or share with there kids this amazing spiritual journey -- I am thrilled. Things happen -- it is what we do with it that matters most... Share, live, learn, love, and grow... it is our only real job! Everything else is just chaff...